Keeping a Child in his Car Seat/Seat Belt
I used to use
Magic to get the kids all buckled up! Yes
Magic!! I would start by asking myself
aloud, “I wonder if I can use magic to get us all safe?” If my children agreed that was a great idea,
I then closed my eyes and said the Magic Word, “Abbra Cadabra, Ala Kazam!!” I might have to say it a few times, as I wave
my hands in a circle magically (as I
listen to them scrambling to buckle up).
When I opened my eyes at last, I could exclaim, “You did it! I must be magic!” My children would laugh with delight.
Car Seats are wonderful for keeping children safe. But they can be a source of much frustration
for a busy parent. Before you can keep a
child in his car seat, you must figure out how to get a child in it. Many a fussing, kicking child does not want
to be put in.
1. Distract!
Anna
arranges the car seats so they are within easy reach of her car door. Her smaller child is positioned within her
easiest reach. She tries to place the
car seats out of the sun so that the metal parts would not burn on hot days—and
when the sun was unavoidable, she places a washcloth or towel over that part. Anna has determined to do her best not to leave her
little ones in the car seat too long so they wouldn’t learn to hate it.
When
it’s time to get in, that is the time to use the wonderful art of
Distraction! Sing a silly song, like the
one I know about froggies where you get to stick out your tongue! Talk about the exciting things that will be
at our destination! Talk about a toy, a
fire truck, a favorite pet, anything that will take the child’s attention away
from the task at hand. Your enthusiasm
or at least cheerfulness will be catching!
2. Consistency
Bridget
decided that putting and keeping baby in his car seat would be so much less of
a struggle if there were never an exception.
She vowed to never even once allow her child out of the car seat, even
for a short drive, or her struggle would be all the greater. Matter-of-factly, she insists on the car seat
every time. However, Bridget works to
not give the matter too much attention, so it won’t become a power
struggle.
3. Make Car Rides Fun
Tehya
finds ways to make going in the car a fun experience, ie with games. Her family likes “I Spy” or “Find the
alphabet” or “Twenty Questions.” A
continuing story in which the older kids each add a part is fun. Whenever she has to carpool, Tehya sings fun
or silly songs or Primary songs, or puts in a CD. She also keeps a stash of books or car games
only for the car.
MiShelle’s
kids were too old for car seats, but they were not in the habit of getting on
their seat belts, so MiShelle was worried
about their safety. She decided to make
a game of the issue. If her kids got
their seat belts on before her, she owed them a treat. If she was first, they
owed her one! Her friend Abby, upon
hearing this idea, kept a baggie of tiny mints in her car. If her kids beat her with their seat belts
on, they got one. Abby found that it was
mainly herself who needed the incentive to get safe! When it became a habit for all to buckle
up quickly, she would still race the kids periodically, but no longer needed
the extra incentive.
My
favorite idea:
I
race my grandkids to see who can beat me “getting safe.” (Of course, this is for those who are old enough to
buckle up alone.) I slowly buckle on my
seat belt so everyone has a chance to Beat Grandma! They are so pleased when they beat me! (No
treat necessary!!)
4. Tough Consequences. A child may have to be told, “If you don’t
get safe, you can’t go.” Choose a time
to enforce this when there really is someone at home to leave him home with! Take the child back into the house. If at all possible, allow a second chance,
and don’t make the whole thing too horrific.
But if need be, stick to your guns to get across the message that car
seats are not optional!
5. Explain.
If
your child is old enough, explain why we use car seats. Debby’s 2 ½-year old responded to a story of
his older brother falling forward when the car stopped fast and getting a bad
cut on his head because he wasn’t safely in a car seat. Now her child says, “Please buckle me in my
car seat or I’ll get a cut!” She also tells her kids—in a positive way—that policemen are watching to make sure we are safe in
our cars too.
Be
positive. Praise when a child learns to
climb in by himself. Tell Dad. Or tell Grandma. Praise when she learns to do her own buckles.
Avoid too much scolding for the undesirable actions or you may be giving
negative reinforcement of behaviors you don’t want.
Tired of nagging her kids to get on seat belts, Kimberly
tried a different approach. She told her
kids about car accidents, in which the occupants had been thrown from the
car. “I just love you so much,” she
said, “that I need for you to be safe in the car!” Sure of their mother’s concern for them, her
kids were much more willing to buckle up.
7. Be compassionate.
See it from a child’s point of view.
Children don’t know what it means that the destination is only 10 miles
away! Dangling feet get tired, so figure
out a place for them to rest them, i.e. a stool.
Let them out to stretch! And
Run! Darlene took a cross country trip
with her family of 5 little boys. To
make it work, they found a park in each city for restless bodies to wiggle and play!
8. Use Prayer!
Here
is one Grandma’s experience:
“I buckled Chloe into her car seat,
secured my own seat belt, and drove out of their driveway. However, before we
reached the end of the street, Chloe had unbuckled her seat belt and was
standing up, looking over my shoulder, and talking to me! I pulled the car over
to the side of the road, got out, and buckled her back into her seat.
“We started again but had gone only a
short distance when she was out of her seat again. I repeated the same steps,
but this time before I could even get back into the car and fasten my own seat
belt, Chloe was already standing up!
“I found myself sitting in a car,
parked on the side of the road, having a power struggle with a three-year-old.
And she was winning!
“I used every idea I could think of to
convince her that remaining fastened in her car seat was a good idea...
“We couldn’t spend the day sitting on
the edge of the road, but I wanted to be obedient to the law, and it wasn’t
safe to drive with Chloe standing up. I offered a silent prayer and heard the
Spirit whisper, ‘Teach her.’
“I turned to face her and pulled my
seat belt away from my body so she could see it. I said, ‘Chloe, I am wearing
this seat belt because it will protect me. But you aren’t wearing your seat
belt, and you won’t be safe. And I will be so sad if you get hurt.’
“She looked at me; I could almost see
the wheels turning in her little mind as I waited anxiously for her response.
Finally, her big blue eyes brightened, and she said, ‘Grandma, you want me to
wear my seat belt because you love me!’
Please share your favorite way of getting babies or kids to get in and stay in their car seats by commenting below.
Labels: Babies--Car Seats, Children--Buckled In
